Terminating 7 pregnancies enough to take my life – Mother of four

But for the quick intervention of the Police, Ifeoma Joy Obiora, a 27-year old woman could have ended her life over domestic violence.

Obiorah, an indigene of Okpunoegbu, Umudim Nnewi, Anambra state recently dropped a suicide note on her Facebook page saying she could no longer cope with the abuses she received from her husband, Mr Onyebuchi Obiora.

A mother of four, Obiora said her 12-year old marriage had been characterised with various forms of domestic violence.

She said she got married at the age of 15 while she was in Senior Secondary 1, saying the early marriage scuttled the ambition.

She said, “As the only child of my parents, i got married at the age of 15. That was in my SS 1. As a result, I could not finish my education.

“My husband forces sex on me and had forced me to terminate seven pregnancies, which made me to suffer various illnesses.

“Initially, he gives me N500 daily for my upkeep until after much plea, he increased it to N1,000.

“Due to my deficiency in education l could not get any work. So l told him to open a business for me but he refused.”

According to her, the last straw that broke the camel’s back was the day the husband refused to release neither the car key nor that of the bike to enable her go for school runs.

She added, “What led to my attempt to take my life was because my husband seized the key to my car and bike. When I demanded to know the reason, he said he wants to put me where other men put their wives.

“I asked him for the keys to go and pick my kids in school, he said l shouldn’t worry that he will be doing that. I then collected N200 from him to go home.

“On getting home my 12 year old daughter told me that she overheard her daddy discussing with his mother that on the Monday he went for prayers the man of God told him to see him after service.

“He eventually went and was told that he was not supposed to marry his wife that two of them are not meant to be together, he should do all he could to cage her.

“After hearing these and coupled with my health challenges and what l was passing through in the marriage, l feel like ending my life, that was why I wrote that on my Facebook page.

“People who saw it including friends started calling me, some were praying for me. Later l was in the room chatting with my phone when I had a knock on the gate.

“The house boy came up and told my husband that it was the police officers on the gate. He told the boy not to open the gate.

“The next thing is for him to badge into the room l was and started beating me. He accused me of calling police for him. l said l never did. He wanted to strangle me. He dragged me on the neck and came down stairs. My children were crying begging him to leave me.

” The police called him on the phone and asked what was happening. He said nothing that everything was alright. l started shouting at the background that he wants to kill me. That was when they asked him to open the door for them which he did.

“After questioning us that night we were invited to the Area Command, Nnewi the next day. There we learnt that it was the Human Rights Commission, including SAFENEST, that told the Police about it, so they were all there”.

Obiora further disclosed that the matter was later transferred to CID Awka where the Police Pubic Relations Officer in the State interrogated her after which she was refered to Women’s and Children’s Affairs ministry.

According to her, the Commissioner for Women’s Affairs intimidated her and wanted to seize her phone, stressing that her concern was for her to reconcile with her husband forgetting her poor health condition and violence she has been experiencing in the marriage.

“The commissioner asked what I want, l said separation. She said l will get the custody of my children since they are above five years, l said no problem, but l can be coming to visit them, she said they will not grant me that also, she said all sorts of things.

“It was SAFENEST, WACOL, National Human Rights Commission and others who had been taking care of me since then,” she added.

When contacted, Police Pubic Relations Officer in the State, Mr Haruna Mohammed said the matter was a family issue and refered it to Women’s Affairs ministry to handle.

“There is no criminal matter on the issue,” he said.

Efforts to get the reactions of the Commissioner for Women’s Affairs were unsuccessful as she never answered her call nor respond to text message sent to her.

Meanwhile, a member of SAFENEST who is a neighbor to the family and was among the team that rescued the victim, Mrs Chinenye Obiefuna testified that Mr Onyebuchi Obiora often abused and battered his wife Ifeoma.

Reacting on the development, the Coordinator, National Human Rights Commission in Anambra State, Mrs Nkechi Ugwuanyi expressed disappointment with the manner the Commissioner for Women’s Affairs handled the matter.

She said the commissioner should have considered the plight the victim in the said marriage before attempting to reconcile the couple.

“We are supporting divorce, best option is to remove the victim from the environment where she experience violence to enable her to regain from the traumatized. That’s the professional thing to do first,” she noted.